Miserable Singletons, Again
It's at times like this when I consider myself lucky to be single. I may have the occasional moan about the lack of man in my life or in my bed, but I would take my own company any day over a guy that is playing havoc with my brain.
I must stress. I'm not a man hater. I love men and want to The Ideal Man™ (I got that habit from Kat ) but experience has taught me that men are an exhausting species. I'm not saying that women are perfect, they're not, but we just don't have the same idiosyncrasies as men. It's taken me a long time to learn that spending my time in the company of men that don't know my worth is a waste of my precious time. I've been with the butcher, the baker, the candlestick friggin maker (not literally but you get the point) and if there is one thing I'm certain of, I will not allow myself to not ask enough of myself. Some of my friends, especially John, say I'm picky. I don't think that there is anything wrong with me extending a little quality control to a prospective partner and if that makes me picky, then I'm picky.
As I listened to my friend talk about her ex last night and another friend talk about her ex today, I realised that I should be luxuriating in my singleness. In fact, every single person should be. Our time will come and we'll sometimes wish we were bloody single. We shouldn't waste our precious time now wondering about this man/woman that doesn't exist yet and when he/she will appear in our lives and whisk us away on a white horse.
My friends are moaning about ex-boyfriends that are still lurking in their present and I keep telling them that they are wasting precious energy getting upset over them. One of my friend's ex called her up and they rowed for about an hour. She was all upset and spitting with rage down the phone to me. I had to break it to her and tell her that the lowlife that she has spent so many years with wasn't sitting at home moping over someone else. That knowing him and his dodgy track record he was probably out with the boys, or screwing his new woman, but the point I was trying to make is that he wasn't sitting at home dissecting their conversation. She agreed with me but still ended up moping. Women!
I still feel a bit dodge but I will be going to work tomorrow. Whatever I eat makes my stomach hurt either soon after, or hours later so I'm feeling like pooh. I've decided to eat as normal otherwise I wouldn't eat a thing. The pain is bloody horrible and I do not like feeling like I'm going to pass out and heave all over myself. This whole sickness thing is boring. I don't think I remember what it's like to be normal and not in pain. I popped around to see my great uncle with my aunt today and for about half an hour I could barely move my right arm and my fingers became really swollen. Despite only being awake for a few hours, I felt overwhelming tired whilst I was there, although that could because my great uncle, bless him, was waffling on like there was no tomorrow. Thankfully my aunt has made my dinner for me so I have been spared the act of cooking for one. Again.
I'm watching the American Idol auditions and I feel sick again, but this time because these people have the most woeful bloody voices. Oh dear.....
I must stress. I'm not a man hater. I love men and want to The Ideal Man™ (I got that habit from Kat ) but experience has taught me that men are an exhausting species. I'm not saying that women are perfect, they're not, but we just don't have the same idiosyncrasies as men. It's taken me a long time to learn that spending my time in the company of men that don't know my worth is a waste of my precious time. I've been with the butcher, the baker, the candlestick friggin maker (not literally but you get the point) and if there is one thing I'm certain of, I will not allow myself to not ask enough of myself. Some of my friends, especially John, say I'm picky. I don't think that there is anything wrong with me extending a little quality control to a prospective partner and if that makes me picky, then I'm picky.
As I listened to my friend talk about her ex last night and another friend talk about her ex today, I realised that I should be luxuriating in my singleness. In fact, every single person should be. Our time will come and we'll sometimes wish we were bloody single. We shouldn't waste our precious time now wondering about this man/woman that doesn't exist yet and when he/she will appear in our lives and whisk us away on a white horse.
My friends are moaning about ex-boyfriends that are still lurking in their present and I keep telling them that they are wasting precious energy getting upset over them. One of my friend's ex called her up and they rowed for about an hour. She was all upset and spitting with rage down the phone to me. I had to break it to her and tell her that the lowlife that she has spent so many years with wasn't sitting at home moping over someone else. That knowing him and his dodgy track record he was probably out with the boys, or screwing his new woman, but the point I was trying to make is that he wasn't sitting at home dissecting their conversation. She agreed with me but still ended up moping. Women!
I still feel a bit dodge but I will be going to work tomorrow. Whatever I eat makes my stomach hurt either soon after, or hours later so I'm feeling like pooh. I've decided to eat as normal otherwise I wouldn't eat a thing. The pain is bloody horrible and I do not like feeling like I'm going to pass out and heave all over myself. This whole sickness thing is boring. I don't think I remember what it's like to be normal and not in pain. I popped around to see my great uncle with my aunt today and for about half an hour I could barely move my right arm and my fingers became really swollen. Despite only being awake for a few hours, I felt overwhelming tired whilst I was there, although that could because my great uncle, bless him, was waffling on like there was no tomorrow. Thankfully my aunt has made my dinner for me so I have been spared the act of cooking for one. Again.
I'm watching the American Idol auditions and I feel sick again, but this time because these people have the most woeful bloody voices. Oh dear.....
7 Comments:
i've always believed that when you're living and loving your life, when you're not looking for a man, one will be drawn to you. but this strength-of-self goes straight out the window when i see people in love... or in lust... meaning the strength-of-self probably wasn't that strong to begin with! you're right, when a man and woman break up, no matter who instigated it, the man just seems to spring back faster and the woman is *analyzing* and keeping herself mired in the disappointment. sometimes i wish i could be a man to not fret so much!
So are you trying to sound extra British? Or do you all sound like this when you "feel a bit dodge?" I so need to start using that one.
blug
You're so totally, totally right. It's just that it's hard to deal with, sometimes, when you've been single for 4 years and the only 'worthwhile' men that appear are those that are already married. It's so frustrating.
Nothing wrong with being "picky," but I prefer to think of it as being selective: you have to be concrete and secure in the most important characteristics that you want in a mate and not compromise those - everything else is fluff as far as I'm concerned.
(I'm sorry you're still feeling sickly... will send good vibes your way in the hopes that things will ease soon.)
I agree! Why settle for less? Life is too short to be with a *boring* man! And guys are dogs.
Woof!
Yeah NML - I agree with your reasoning and your sentiments, and on the whole I try not to worry about it, whatver will be will be, but sometimes, I just ache to be in a loving relationship y'know? And I find myself getting all moany and self-indulgent.
Hope you're feeling a little better now chuck
x
My oh my! Looks like I'm stirring things up as usual ;-)
Wyn - I hear ya! Just remember that men are the icing on the cake, not the actual cake. I've told myself that plenty of times.
Anonymous - No I'm afraid I'm not being extra British. I have a fondness for using variations of the word dodgy.
Zee - Thanks for the good vibes. Tummy is still a bit iffy but getting there so maybe you've helped! Oh and I love that choice of words 'selective'. I'll be bandying it around the office now!
Anonymous - Hilarious! You've both said what many of us are thinking but think we may be too harsh to say. Not all of them are dogs though.......
The Lone Pen - Cheeky and controversial as usual!
PPQ - Me and you are tres similar. I empathise entirely with you. Take comfort in knowing that there are others that feel the same. Thanks for the concern. I'm getting better! x
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