Jaysus the big three-oh is approaching
Yesterday was the first of July and when I acknowledged the date, a tremor of fear went through me. "Oh feck! I'm 30 in 27 days!" I wailed to the boyf. He chuckled and said "Yep! You're getting old now honey!" I pinched him and reminded him that at 34, he's no-one to talk.
I remember being about 7 or 8 years old and saying "I'm going to be 30 in the year 2007" and thinking that it seemed so far away in a futuristic time when we'd probably have robots cleaning our houses and driving around in space cars just like in The Jetsons. Yet here I am with the big three-oh upon me and I'm still cleaning my own home and haven't got my driving license yet. On the subject of driving, I had planned to be doing my test this month but there is the small matter of a c-section which has blighted my plans.... Sometimes I wonder if driving and I are meant to happen...Anyway I digress...
I used to wisecrack that I'd love to be settled and have a baby by the time I was thirty a few years back but then I looked at the wasteland that was my dubious dating past and figured that with that many dodgy boyfriends and man experiences, it was safe to say that these things wouldn't be happening for a long time. Of course, life changed when I met the boyf and we all know how that story went as I became a mum (the bambino is pictured yawning on her playmat) and a homeowner at the end of May and I'm very much settled in our little country town at the edge of London.
Actually I digress again...There can't be too many black folk around this area. OK, I know there aren't as I've only seen one and it was on the day we moved here. But the main reason I know is because I had a look in the local baby shop and was just about to buy something when I saw two golliwog frigging dolls grinning at me from the shelves! After my last golliwog experience, I beat a hasty retreat and they won't be seeing a penny of my money!
So anyway, back to being thirty. I can only claim to be twenty-something for another 26 days which means I'll definitely have to do that redesign of my blog that I promised. They say thirties is the new twenties, so I wont be expecting to feel hugely different, although I wonder if I'll feel compelled to be more 'adult' like. Will I control my boobs better or swear less? I have actually been swearing a lot less for the bambino anyway... Will I suddenly develop a penchant for baking cakes and sewing? Will I stop secretly watching Hollyoaks religiously and start watching Emmerdale? (For those that don't know, the former is a soap aimed at teenagers that lots of 20 somethings watch and the latter is a soap based around a farming town that 'older folk' watch) Will I become like my mum? Jaysus perish the thought! I'd have to do a lot of crack for that to happen...
Well whatever my thirties holds in store for me, I know that I want to remain true to myself and do more of what I say that I want to do. Despite some adversity, I enjoyed my twenties a hell of a lot and ended up getting true growth from my experiences. I have a lot of great things in my life and I do feel very blessed to be so happy with my little family, so I guess I'll have to just embrace the onslaught of my thirties and enjoy whatever life holds in store for me. Of course, I could go wild for the next 26 days and act like I'm a wild twenty-something but there is the small matter of the bambino and the fact that leaking boobs aren't very trendy on a wild night out....
Labels: dating, Parenthood, Turning thirty
17 Comments:
Turning thirty (30). That is almost like surviving your 20's! Or, another way to imagine, is you are now half-way to sixty (60)!
When I was a lad I figured something out. My Dad had told me that time seemed to crawl until he was 25, then just sped by. (It was later I figured out he was 24 when he married Mom.) But I figured out for myself that -- time is relative. Really. That is, I compare time to my life span. At 10, a year is 1/10th of my life, and a month is almost 1%. At 20, a year is only 5% of my life, and seems only half as interminable as it did at 10. And time just keeps shrinking. I was a mathematical genius. For a couple of weeks.
I noticed "I know that I want to remain true to myself and do more of what I say that I want to do". There is great philosophical discussion on whether nature (genetics) or nurture (experiences and interactions with those around us) are the greater factors in forming our personality. I find that as years roll by, nurture tends to identify and adjust for 'rough edges', whether from what I learned or other inherent .. inclinations. The result is that we tend to change as a person, most often in response to significant events and people that become important in our lives.
The danger of holding 'true to yourself', is that who you are changes. Values and decisions that were appropriate at 12 won't be as 'true' today. With the Bambino, recent move, the boyf, who you are will be changing almost as fast as the bambino grows. You will never again be the NML that once contemplated growing a bump, then watched that bump grow. You are now NML with the bambino. The boyf now has you and the bambino. Whatever the future brings, it will only be additions. These things will never "not be". Just as claiming you are about to be 29-10 won't change the fact that you were 20-something for 10 whole years, and will no longer be, whatever you call the time span .. ( I think Elayne Boosler was the first I heard use the 29-10, 29-11 sequence of counting ages.)
Being true to yourself will take a lot of soul searching, to find out what that means. Every time life jars your daily plans, gifts you with a new insight, or blesses you with another source of joy.
But anyway, happy birthday - to - be!
That baby is so cute... I just wanna pinch her cheeks!
hey sistalove. 30 is a great beginning. you will love the thirties. and when you have moved through them, you will simply adore the forties. i am told that fifites and sixties are great too. happy early b-day. enjoy. see you soon. peace, ananda
She is soooo adorable! You're all grown up now, lol
Jeez, that last year really has flown past, hasn't it? One hell of a rollercoaster for you I'm sure...
Bambino looks awfully like she's doing her Mr T impression - "I ain't eatin' no greens, fool!" Yep, scarily like her mother... ;-)
x
Hey just found your blog while doing research for my boss, she is doing a post about dating blog. Great topic, I look forward to reading more, I'll suggest you to Regina for the Blogroll.
www.reginalewis.com
Thanks!
Libby Myers
Producer, ReginaLewis.com
Wow
Old woman
Only joking!!!
You had your turn now it's mine!!!
Nah, but seriously, it's not all that bad!!! Like you said, you've accomplished a lot and you've inspired me to make the most of my youth so I don't look back and have regrets of things I didn't do :)
All hail the thirty something woman!!! And I wonder if being thirty will change your blog? Looking back on your first entries I can see a biiiig difference!!!
Just think, all your experiences will make you better and being thirty-something isn't as old as it sounds..you could be sixty something
Plus...just think...in 2017 you will be 40!!!!
I can't speak from a woman's perspective, but my thirties were great! I waited until I was 37 when I decided that I wanted to get married. Now, I am about a month away from my 40th. Honestly, I hadn't thought about it until I read this post. :)I'm sure things will get more and more interesting.
Look at that little lady. She looks like she has sooooo much to say. Peace~ x
I didn't mind turning 30. I was just happy I was alive to reach it. As I approach 36 this year I feel the same way. I think of my birthday and a finish line. Another year survived in life. It isn't bad being thirty. It is great. Just another era to enjoy.
The baby is adorable! Thanks for sharing the pic.
Nearly 30, the old biological clock is ticking, you better get cracking on some more babies!
Seriously, speaking as a 42 yr old turning 30 is not as bigger deal as hitting 40.
Anyway, I hope you are all well and the bambino is lovely (I'm feeling broody now, I wonder if I can get Wifey drunk tonight?)
Turning 30 means you can look at the people in their 20s and assume that they haven't gotten their life together yet - and you'd probably be right. It was scary for me, but after a year or so it kind of grew on me.
Cute pic btw!
She is a cutie - and honestly turning 30 doesn't feel any different at all. I promise.
Hey, I'm 43 and I've never felt compelled to be "adult-like" yet!
Anyway, 31 is worse than 30. Because for the next year you are just 30. But the year after that you are "in your thirties!"
Hey u. Congraulations(proud of u!).
Happy almost 30 :)
She is such a cutie!
You think you've got problems? I remember thinking that I'll be 40 in the year 2000 :-(
She's gorgeous, by the way - like her Mum x
If it's any reassurance, I'm about to turn 45 (yikes) and I've never developed a penchant for sewing or baking cakes.
The 30s are great, but so are the 40s, and from what I hear, the 50s have their advantages too.
You'll always be fab!
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