White socks and black trousers, a nose for a robbery, and not recognising flirting

I dragged myself down to my local Carphone Warehouse yesterday as I desperately needed a new mobile phone. OK, desperately is a bit of an exaggeration...but one phone has been on the blink for the past few weeks due to attack of bambino saliva and the other is my phone from my long-standing employer, The Evergrowing Media Owner. I don't like restrictions or being scared that a whopping bill will arrive for excess charges plus I reason that the new freelancing me needs a phone that can cope with email... I'm sure you can see where this is heading.

Within seconds of speaking to the sales guy, he confessed that he is a white sock and black trouser wearer (I have the heebee jeebees just thinking about it) in response to me telling him off for trying to sell me a pink mobile phone. I like pink but it doesn't define my womanhood and I certainly don't need pink products around the house to balance out the 'manly' looking products. That...and I wanted a Blackberry.

"You'd better not be wearing white socks now or I'm not buying anything off you" I quipped. "It'd be like buying something from a guy with a combover...." and we cracked up laughing.

As I waited for him to finish another sale, I noticed three youths looking a bit dodgy behind me.

"They look a bit dodge...I bet they're casing the joint...God he looks like he hasn't washed for a week...Oh f*ck I think he thinks I'm staring at him...LOOK DOWN...Actually brazen it out and act like you're drooling over the iphone..."

They left a few minutes later and they were promptly forgotten. Half an hour later with the sales guy advised on style tips for dating, I left with my Blackberry. Less than half an hour later I had to go back to the store as the sim card didn't seem to fit and when I got to the door, it was locked. The sales guy appeared at the door looking a bit scared and let me in.

"You having a private party or something?" I joked.
"Remember those guys that looked shifty earlier?"
I nodded warily.
"They just robbed the store and made off with all the iphones!"

I KNEW it! My spidey senses coupled with my detective skills honed on too many episodes of Law and Order and CSI have given me a knack for spotting dodgy youths that rob iPhones.

"Hah!" I said triumphantly to the boyf later. "There you are thinking I'm a snob and it turns out that I'm just a damned good detective!" I declared. "

"Once! You got it right once!" he said in mock exasperation.
"What-e-ver! This is just the one we know about!" I giggled.

"Was that guy flirting with you? Why is he telling you about his white socks and black trouser thing?" the boyf teased.

"Oh pur-lease! Do I look like the type of woman that gets turned on by that sh*t!? He wasn't flirting! He just wanted to chat and get style tips!"

"Oh my God! You don't even know when a guy is flirting with you anymore!" and we cracked up laughing.

To be fair, I am so caught up in my own little world that when guys smile at me, wave, or even beep, I just think they're being...oh I don't know...I didn't even think about it before but it seems like there is some truth to the boyf's statement....

I had to go back to the store this morning because it turns out that there was something wrong with the phone. I left with the newer version which has GPS...at no extra charge. Result!

I have sworn to the boyf that I will not become addicted to my Blackberry.... Did I ever tell you about the Great Blackberry Incident? When I went back to work for four whole days at the beginning of January, in the midst of the debacle, my director took me out for lunch to woo me. The whole frickin time he was on the Blackberry and just as I'm talking about a really sensitive point, his eyes glaze over and I can see him staring behind me. I stopped talking. "Oh sorry...I think I just spotted Lesley Phillips sitting behind you..." I stared at him blankly. "From the Carry On Films...you know 'Oh be-have'...Or maybe it's..." and he continued debating with himself about who it was and then said "I'll just take a picture and send it..." I swear that won't be me!