There was a few minutes earlier when the boyf and I were discussing the bambino and how we're going to have be firmer, as she's fast learning how to run rings around us. For starters, we're gonna have to crack down on the bed situation as she keeps rocking up in the middle of the night since about a month before her little sister was born. We could probably hack it more if she didn't either, 1, swan into the room as if it was the middle of the day gaily saying "Hallo mummy! Hallo daddy! He-lll-o!" which startles me out of my sleep, or 2, yell for me from her bed as if needing permission to do what she's already been doing for the past few months!
When I got up this morning, my dad, who has finally returned like the prodigal father to finish off the overdue DIY (more on that later) said "I heard the bambino yelling for you last night at about quarter to three. I was laughing to myself when she got all sarcastic with you!"
Yes, my not even two years and one month old child has discovered sarcasm...even at 3am...and when I didn't respond quickly enough, she got all snippy with me!
We've agreed that if we're awake and she strolls in, she's going to be taken back to her own bed each time along with clamping down on demands for 'bisquits'...
Afterwards the boyf said "Gosh, we sounded like proper parents for a few minutes there!" and we both giggled. I think we still have bemused moments where we look around us at signs of being overrun by a couple of kids and still can barely believe it!
I threatened to disown my father 'Gwandad' last night which gave him something to stutter and flap his mouth over. It's no secret on here that my family are crackers, albeit in an often funny way, but he's forced me to play the 'disowning card' because a few days before I went off to have the baby, he told me he was popping home (Wolverhampton) and would be back in a few days to finish all the jobs he'd promised to do...and returned a couple of days ago! The child was born over 9 weeks ago!
"Because you didn't come back, I painted the shelves in their room myself and botched up the wallpaper AND THEN when I was leaving the room, the tin of gloss tipped over, burst open, and wrecked the feckin' carpet in the hall!" I seethed at him.
Anyway, he's back now, and of course he sprung it on me that he has to pop to my aunts for a couple of days to finish a job there and then he's back till mid next week. I'm going to have to rename him as 'Flake' if he's not careful...
"You'd better not be pulling a swift one one me! I have my eye on you!" and we laughed. "I mean it! If you don't come back, I'm divorcing you!" I threatened.
"Er, don't you mean disowning me?" he said and we all howled with laughter.
"Yeah yeah...you know exactly what I mean!"
I have got to stop mixing up my words! I called a guy a 'd*ckstick' when I meant dipstick... I blame parenthood...It's mashed my brain...
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
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7 comments:
You make me laugh so hard over these posts - but that's only because I'm not being woken in the middle of the night by a sassy-mouthed toddler and mixing my words up because I'm so tired !
NML, two books.
Tools for Teaching, Fred Jones. Every parent should have access to the understanding and application of classroom control - and discipline - in their homes. Not to mention prepping the kid to be ready to behave in the classroom - and learning techniques to manage kids at any time. Just reading some of the chapters, I found the content showing up in the classroom the next day or three.
Lyons on Horses. A horse training book by John Lyons. Lyons relies on "resistance free" training. And his approach at solving problems tends to work even when you aren't working with a horse. Just remember "training to load in a trailer" is a wonderful horse training technique, but more of a metaphor for an approach with other trainees.
From my substitute teacher days, I found to phrases to be surprisingly powerful. "Not today." and "No." Explanations tend to invite dialogue and you lose control of the lesson, as well as losing the meaning of the lesson. Distinguish between training - where you explain the why and rules - and interventions, which need to be abrupt, immensely clear, and immediate. Hence, the intervention phrase, "No."
Blessed be!
I have fun whilst reading your post. Never thought that while reading I find it interesting and I am reading some more as of now!
More power
My older two (6 and 4) share a room. Unfortunately Zak has a habit of talking himself to sleep, which REALLY winds Lily up. SOoooooo WHAT YA GOONA DO? Honestly, I have explained, cajoled, trailed up and down the stairs...now I just stay put when they start (usually about 10 minutes after lights out, when they've finished giggling over what has amused them most that evening)and yell, fish wife style; "IF YOU TWO DON'T STOP THIS NOW I'M TAKING AWAY YOUR BEANO ANNUALS!" I do a bit of "...gOING ON FOR MONTHS...SERIOUSLY SICK OF THIS...I NEED TO RELAX TOO" etc etc, just for good measure. It seems to work ;-)
Just looked back at all my spelling errors...I could spell...a long time ago...pre kids.
Katherine,
Just a thought.
I raised a Belgian Draft horse filly from 9 months. In training I came across an intervention technique, to be used if the horse committed an act of disrespect. For horses, this includes biting, stepping on your foot (a two thousand pound horse, with 60% of the weight and strength in the front end, and it is usually a front foot that steps on your foot, that *pushes* off when jumping off your foot when you scream), also kicking, pushing into you or trying to walk right over you.
The ten second rule goes like this. When the horse does something disrespectful, you have ten (10) seconds to "kill" the horse. The horse has to *know* it is being killed, use no weapons but an open hand and voice, use lots of voice. You have to start within four (4) seconds of the initial act of the horse. At the end of the ten (10) seconds, you stop. No late hits, no lingering punishments. If you cannot start within for (4) seconds, you don't get to use the rule - if you don't start right away, then your intervention is just an attack, and the horse won't connect the attack to the act of disrespect - no training takes place.
I also ran across someone that pointed out that the horse has to be calm to learn. It wastes your time and the horse's if he is tense or distracted or frustrated. Learning doesn't happen.
One of the first things we teach a draft horse, and we always enforce strictly, is "whoa". And every time we use whoa on the horse, we expect and demand that it be prompt. If the stop is sloppy or ignore - we reinforce the training until we get that safe and secure stop. People and horse lives can depend on prompt and correct obedience.
I haven't seen anything about horse training that doesn't apply to children. Horse training results just come a bit quicker. Well, and we seldom train children to stand with one foot held for trimming and shoeing, and seldom use nails on their feet.
What you have at your children's bed time is a ritual, not disobedience. Your actions, that this same event recurs every night, has become part of their bedtime routine. They expect and are comforted by this process. At a minimum, you are enabling their continued fussing.
I always figured if I had to use the ten (10) second rule twice in a month, I had to review my training program. Because interventions that become a habit cease to be intervention, and just a bad habit. And retraining to undo vices (bad habits) always takes much more time than doing and keeping it right.
Two books you might find interesting. Lyons on Horses by John Lyons is a horse training book, where he applies his resistance free techniques. Tools for Teaching by Fred Jones is an excellent book for teachers, focusing on classroom discipline. The background for understanding how to prepare your children to excel - including behave - in the classroom can reduce stress and conflict at home, too. Much of the book is specific to the classroom, especially elementary, but a lot is useful at home, too. If you don't want to buy Tools for Teaching, you might see if you can borrow one from the library or local school.
Sweet dreams!
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