I’m thirty two in a couple of days and as a testament to how overloaded my brain is and how tired I am, I actually thought it was on Wednesday. I’m not even doing anything proper for it which is a first as I always do something but I just can’t be arsed! In the days before the kids and working for myself, I knew when my birthday was, had something planned and always knew when the bank holidays were – now the weekends are merging into my week! I need a frickin’ holiday! I stayed in bed most of yesterday afternoon in a bit of a funk – think it’s a mixture of tiredness, bit of worry, and God knows what. I’m fine now though, mostly as the boyf made me get up and have a laugh, putting some perspective on things.
I think I’m having a mid life crisis or something but I think I have said that each birthday since I started this blog (jaysus I’ve had six birthdays on this blog!). I’m just being moody and melodramatic! And yes…I did have the blood test. The results are on Wednesday. The boyf was not impressed when I told him that I’d bunked off – he just didn’t get why I’d do something like that when the quickest route to putting myself out of my misery would be to have the blood test!
The bambino has entered the stage of non stop yabbering and questions.
What’s wrong? Where are you going? What are you doing? What ya doing? What you saying? Why you saying what you’re saying? Where’s the biscuits? I want Charlie and Lola! Where’s daddy? I want a drink! Where’s your bag mommom? I want a story. SIT DOWN MUMMY! LIE DOWN MUMMY! Mummy, draw apple! No mummy, this one! (Hands me a red marker) No mummy, now this one! (Snatches the red marker and swaps it for a blue…) Are you OK? Don’t wanna sleep! I want brush the teeth. No mummy like this! MY MONEY! No, it’s not your money! Ha, ha! Silly mummy! Mummy! Daddy not doing it! NO mummy! I want eat not milk! Mummy there’s a dinosaur!
She’s almost 26 months…I thought it would be a while before this started…I’m now nervous of what the 27th month will bring. Will she be asking me if she can stay out past her 7.30 pm curfew? Will she be borrowing my clothes and hogging the phone? Jaysus! I’m being outfoxed by a mini-me!
Baby Moochie just wants to be suckered to my boob all day. I’ve explained to her that there’s a great big world out there beyond two bouncy brown breasty pillows of milk…
I made a tit out myself in Waitrose again a few days ago but it was only as I was explaining it to Uncle Titty (the bro) that I realised just how ridiculous it was.
I’d only popped in for a few things and next thing I’d racked up just over twenty quid. As soon as I opened my wallet, my heart sank.
Ah feck! I’ve left the debit card at the bottom of my handbag…on the sofa. Oh I know, I’ll use the spare account for miscellaneous ‘emergencies’…Oh arse! The boyf forgot to put the cash in the account yesterday. Oh I know, I’ll use the emergency credit card… Thank God that’s gone through. WHAT!!! It’s cancelled! Oh…the card has expired…. oh arse, feck, bollox, numpty, feck, feck, feck! I can’t remember the pins on any of the other cards!
Then I had to go through the rigmarole of taking things out the basket as I only had £16 on me. Scarlet O’Hara I was, but then they’re well used to me as I kept forgetting my purse when I was pregnant…
I got home and told Uncle Titty who was keeping an eye on the girls for me.
“OH NO!” he said horrified when I explained. “I’ll go back for you and get them! What did you have to leave behind? Was it dinner stuff?”
“Oh…er…a copy of Elle Decoration magazine…four packets of Haribo sweets (on a buy one get one free – was going to hide as a secret stash in my ‘office’), a four pack of eclairs…er….never mind!”
{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }
The mini-me terrorizing the tired Mommy. Oy !
Having kids is the hardest thing anyone can ever do.
I think the cute baby food and diaper commencials they put on the air are a conspiracy to make women want to get pregant and have babies without knowing how much is really involved in the whole deal!
The one thing that struck me most out of this was – what are you worried about, Nat ?
Is it the blood test or money or both ?
And are you doing your best ? Seems like it to me.
((hugs))
Hey Hun
I think it is just that time of year, I too have been like this and I have not got a new babe attached to me day and night to blame it on!!! You are a fantastic mummy, partner, friend, relax and chill for a while, things will work out, you know they always do.
Love ya xx
I think over this side of the pond they call this Bambino stage "the terrible twos". For a *very* good reason.
Just think of all the fun she will have as a hot date.
I thought of you a bit ago, listening to an old (1988) Dr. Demento tape. Pinker and Bowden sing about "Michael Jackson and Lilian Gish/ Come to the farm / on the satellite dish." I know you talked about doing MJ's moonwalk – so this same show includes Weird Al Yankovic's spoof "Eat it!" (takeoff on Beat It), and Bud Latour's "The Way You Make Me Squeal" (takeoff on The Way You Make Me Feel).
I swear, I heard MJ's I'm Bad the other day, and it sounded . . . wrong. The *right* one, of course, is I'm Fat! by Weird Al.
I found that with horses, we in the States count the age as of January 1. If the horse is born on any day in 2007, since Jan 1, 2009, it has been a three year old. Those that count birthdays may say "coming three" until the actual anniversary of the date of birth. I decided to do the same thing – I have counted my age as 57 since New Years, even though my birthday was a month ago.
About the low energy – are you keeping up plenty of fluids, fiver, and walking? Walking has the advantage (if you leave the kids behind) of providing some quiet thinking and destressing time, even if you share the event with another adult.
I pray for a favorable blood test result.
a copy of Elle Decoration magazine…four packets of Haribo sweets (on a buy one get one free – was going to hide as a secret stash in my 'office'), a four pack of eclairs…
Haha…all the essentials in my mind.
Hope you have a fab birthday x
This took me back …I used to forget my purse so often they had a special corner for my trolley in Sainsburys ….think you should have put the food back and got the essential Elle deco!